Elon Musk-Donald Trump Chainsaw Gang: MUSKrats

If you're tired of the same-old same-old musical merry-go-round, here's a group that really shakes things up and RIPs them apart on its debut recording, MUSKrats, firing brutally and haphazardly at every melodic convention and literally taking no prisoners—aside from an occasional immigrant—as it blasts its way toward a musical coterie in which only charlatans and the super-wealthy can survive.

The histrionic album was recorded at the national mall in Washington, DC, for an audience that Trump estimated at somewhere between two and three billion. "We'd have had even more people here if it hadn't been for some bad weather," he said later, taking a Sharpie from his coat pocket and drawing a hurricane that was headed straight for the DC area.

As to the music, Musk, chainsaw in hand, leads the charge on the inspiring curtain raiser, "O(wn) Canada" (which Trump calls "a fond tribute to our fifty-first state"), gleefully exhorting his partners to take dead aim at every harmonic and deep-seated premise and association, razing and humbling them with the sheer power of their duplicity and arrogance. Musk's mastery of the unwieldy saw is so deft and awesome that some observers have been moved to call it "electric."

Trump, who is not the only lyre in the group (everyone else doubles on that instrument), is at the top of his game when improvising, using his well-honed chops to wheedle, cajole and even threaten his audience while somehow managing to conceal the fact that even the best of his solos are random and utterly pointless drivel, devoid of substance or fact.

Patel, never one to miss an opportunity to rant and delude, uses his mouth organ stridently, seldom pausing for breath even as his ad libs become ever more bizarre and outrageous, while Rubio's cymbal does its best to keep everyone on key and Bondi's fiddlesticks and Graham's bull horn become ever more closely attuned to the chainsaw and lyre.

Gabbard, meanwhile, plays the buffoon to perfection, as does Kennedy on da gamble, showing why he has earned a place of honor among his fellow (con) artists, especially the lyres, for his dogged insistence that ensembles perform best when they discard such overblown instruments as vaccines or medical research and development. Even though his notes are often sour and his tone deceptive, Kennedy earns a well-deserved "A" for alchemy.

The session benefits from an appearance by guest artist Matt Gaetz who blows his own horn with his usual assurance and enthusiasm while lending an aura of adolescent lust and hanky-panky to the enterprise. Hegseth seems especially moved, as he can be heard in the background shouting "I'll drink to that!"

More shocking but no less amusing is a surprise visit from MSNBC host and Trump-Musk adversary Rachel Maddow whose spirited rendition on contrabass of "You'll Never Get Away from Me" from the Broadway musical Gypsy ends with a loud chorus of boos and catcalls from members of the Gang and a vicious retort by Trump on the lyre, alleging that Maddow was born male and shouldn't be allowed to "trans"-fer her hostility to an ethical and totally blameless group of jesters whose only aim is to make America entirely pale and color-averse (in other words, white) again.

In spite of the remarkable deceptiveness of the finished product, several well-informed sources have reported some disagreement among the leaders as to whose name should have beeen listed first in the album's title, a debate that was quickly resolved when Musk showed Trump several billion reasons why his name should prevail.

If you agree that rules and order are outmoded and thus have no place in today's more chaotic but (narrowly) rewarding musical world, MUSKrats is definitely your cup of Kool-Aid. The opinion here is that the Musk-Trump Chainsaw Gang will have found and deported to El Salvador any serious competitors by the time the 2026 Grammy Award nominees are announced later this year.

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