Gwen Mitchell Trio

CHICAGO, IL-In the wake of accusations of releasing allegedly toxic, audio mind-matter, Gwen Mitchell testified Monday that she is inextricably linked to the events. Candid in her confession, she admits, "They caught me holding the guitar."

Investigation reports confirm her complicity in spreading this toxic material in locations all across the Midwest. Health officials warn that the contamination may not be limited to cities from Wisconsin to Ohio and may be continuing to spread.

"We have identified some of the components of the material as being instrumental," but investigators are especially concerned with the lyrics that ask people to seek self-knowledge, responsibility, and worse yet take themselves less seriously.

"I believe this substance is attacking my comfort levels." Says one hospitalized victim who asks that her name be withheld.

Police lab reports confirm that the danger of this enigmatic substance is that it is constantly mutating. "With more people joining forces with Gwen, there's no telling how many changes [the substance] will undergo," offered one affected audience member.

Chief of Police McGillicutty: "We've seen the initial attack as stunning people

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