I actually believe that having or starting a family is more to the heart of the question. I juggle. I am home with my family, in spirit, at all times. Probably even more so when I am physically absent. It has become increasingly more difficult to want to leave my house to play gigs that I may be less enthused about. There were some nights this past winter where I absolutely hated walking out the door and leaving the warmth of my family and apartment to make music. Ever since my son's birth, I have genuinely hated traveling. It doesn't help that the American airline industry has gone to shit behind 9/11 with their lies and terrorism hysteria and fuel price excuses, baggage charges, and having to suffer the ignorance and ineptitude of the TSA all designed to gauge the consumers. I am in service of my family and then I am in service of the music. My health and my family are my top priorities.
The jazz scene is almost nonexistent to me. I'm the last one to hear the rumors or latest gossip. I feel like I live in a bubble. I learn of things now from reading them on Facebook. Otherwise, I'm trying to scrape the pennies together for food, ren,t and child and home related expenses. I also try to maintain my fire and desire to grow within my dream of what music is and could be to me.
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