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Very funny stuff, Jeff! Wish it were true.
You sort of had me going for awhile, but the "stunned by this development" redundancy finally triggered the joke synapses. Nevertheless, I am going to send the link to my 20-year old daughter, because it might pique some curiosity. Can't hurt, right? And it is funny, too. Nice job.
Had me going too. Should have caught it right off the bat with the Sinatras and the clothing descriptions.
I knew it wasn't true when I read to the beboppers...! Unfortunately the new Spalding music is not too far removed from the autotune.
Nicely done, but damn, if this were only true! I have known some young people, who once they actually heard the music, liked it. But with so little exposure, and some of the exposure almost set up to turn young people off (like most of the brief Grammy Show segments over the years), it's a tough road to hoe. Sadly, I believe had the dynamic, diverse "Contemporary Jazz" movement of the 70s/80s not been co-opted by corporate controlled "Smooth Jazz", we'd have a whole different state of Jazz today.... If Jazz ain't spontaneous, adventurous, creative, & growing in all kinds of directions, it will never capture anyone's attention. When one segment of the music (smooth, grooving) became the whole enchilada, it suffocated all the vitality & growth out of the genre, until it's network of radio stations fell by the wayside, death via "creative atrophy".....
I must admit I got taken all the way to the last sentence. I just assumed that the writer did not set the stage for what seemed like a special event of sorts; so I filled in the blanks. Then I thought, the genius slipped in the Vanilla Ice quote for the heck of it.
Anyway, many critics of Smooth Jazz blame the so-called lack of interest in modern Jazz among this generation on the Kenny G's of the world. Smooth Jazz radio is castigated and vilified. However, it was this very Smooth Jazz and Neo-soul that goaded me to search for a deeper meaning in this thing called Jazz. It was this yearning that drove me to explore the very origins of Jazz to the late nineteenth century in the fragmented roots in Black music and culture and the European derivatives; moved me to listen to everything - in every sub-genre of the Jazz and Blues - I could lay my hands on.
Now, I might be going back full circle in my current explorations of the influences of indigenous sounds on Classic Jazz, my latest obsession. A lot of it might well be labelled Smooth but I call it World. The fact is I explore relentlessly for The Jazz, an approach that may take me well away from the base sometimes. However, every judgement I make is underpinned by two things: The Jazz must be improvised at the core and it has to have some sense of swing. Period.
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