Kate McGarry: The Turtle, The Paradox, and The Big Yes
“ [On the difficulty of defining her music] I have people saying "pick, pick, pick" what you want to do. Get in a can! I've given up - I'm not gonna do it! ”
All About Jazz: Tell me about your Russian tortoise.
Kate McGarry: That's Turbo, aka Buddy, also Tur. When I get mad at him I call him Turbo F. Ganz: "Turbo F. Ganz, you get back here right this moment!
AAJ: You can talk to a turtle?
KM: No. Not really. Keith thinks he interacts more. The thing about Turbo is that he directly reflects what's going on with Keith. It happens all the time. One day the turtle would be like hiding under a thing, and the whole day Keith is like hiding under a thing. It's really wild. Another time, Turbo's up and running around, and Keith is up and running around.
AAJ: Who starts it?
KM: The turtle seems to reflect Keith.
AAJ: I'm relieved to hear that.
KM: But I look to the turtle for signs of what's going on with him. Turbo doesn't make any noise, which is a good kind of pet, but he's not cozy.
AAJ: You can't really cuddle a turtle.
KM: No. And our bacteria's not good for him. You can't touch him, and their bacteria is bad for us, so you have to be careful.
AAJ: It's not your usual pet. So what inspired you to buy a Christmas turtle for Keith?
KM: 'Cause he always talked about them. He relates to turtles; he has a deep love for things that move slowly and at their own pace.
AAJ: I wanted to get into that paradox thing we talked about earlier, because the more I listen to you, the more I'm struck by it. When you first hear your voice, it's sweet and girlish and pure, with that little rasp in it that makes it so wistful. But then you notice how sophisticated your singing is, and your placement, and your ideas, and it's "Wait a minute: what am I listening to?" It's innocence, but it's sophistication; it's free with a definite shape. So talk to me about paradox.
KM: For me it's always been true that when I have an experience of something that felt absolutely like corereally trueit would almost always come in conjunction with something that was the opposite, a situation you'd think was ugh, the worst of the worst of the worst. But right at the pinnacle of that, the cap's off the head and it's all open and wow and OK. The apparent paradox is when you get a little bit above, where you get a bigger view, you see they're not really in opposition.
AAJ: They're a necessary part of each other.
KM: Yeah, there's something about the tension between the two. In music, my interests are both in purity of sound, or less is more, plus the intricacy of soundlike, what was that horn player doing there, what was that line, how did he massage that change? I think it comes from the wish to express something really fully, and yet really simply too.
KM: I think my growing-up circumstances had a big impact on my music because there were so many of us, and it was a very chaotic and crisis-driven household. Mom was very ill most of the time since I was little, and so to some extent she was just out of the picture, except that she needed a lot of caretaking.
AAJ: What did she have?
KM: She had Addison's disease: all the adrenals, all the glands, everything shut down, so she lived on cortisone her whole life. And was severely depressednot able to get up. But one thing we always did was make music together, the whole family. That was one place where we could be together. My mother and father, both, have the most beautiful voices. And for them, singing was the people's entertainment.
AAJ: So music was a way of taking care of each other?
KM: Yes. Also, they were very religious, so we would sing the Rosary together, especially when things weren't greatthat was the thing that would pull it all together.
I have an early experience of the power of singing. When Tricia, my second-to-the-youngest sister, was really little, she had a terrible fever that wouldn't go away. She was up at 105, and it went on for days and days. We were worried about brain damage. The priest came, and we gave her cold baths, but the fever just wouldn't go down. At one point my Mom brought us all up to her room. She put Tricia on her bed on a blanket, and we all held hands around the bed, and we said the Rosary.
AAJ: Did you sing it?
KM: Well, it has singing in it, but I remember it as singing. Maybe it was just because it was afternoon, but at the end of it, there was this beautiful golden light coming through the window on Tricia, and she was bathed in sweat. Her fever had broken. And I remember that the whole time we were doing it, whatever the words meant, I knew that I was calling out to something larger and joining with it, and saying "Don't you hear me? And the answer came back right away: "I hear you. And from that timeI was about six years oldI knew that when you call out, something is listening.
AAJ: Whether or not you're actually inside a church.