Hey kids, remember when the Internet was shiny and new? Back before YouTube and Wikileaks, before Google and Facebook, back when the World Wide Web was only 84% pornography and 16% dancing hamsters? Those were the days, eh, kids? The whole thing seemed filled with such promise of a world where one day, all content would be free and everyone would share intellectual property in some Utopian vision of what socialism would be like if it actually worked.
But here we are. We've awakened again to the reality that stuff costs money. See that pile of stuff over there? You can bet that cost someone something. No matter what it is. Could be a pile of leaves. They may have been free, but it's going to cost someone to remove them. If not money, time and effort. Everything costs, one way or the other.
We at AAJ have been fortunate. Advertising and other considerations have managed to offset our costs for the most part. And, until Philadelphia's doggedly persistent vice squad shut down our floating craps and three-card Monte operations, we were able to not only cover all our expenses and provide for future projects, but had enough left over for the extremely popular Cheesesteak Nite at the AAJ Complex.
Stay with me, kids, I'm going somewhere with all this.
The 2010's are starting out, if not on the wrong foot, certainly wearing the wrong shoes. The economy is sporting stiletto heels when it's obviously duck boot weather. The rainy day everyone is always saving for has not only arrived, it has lingered. All we can do is weather the storm, and keep the things we care about as warm and dry as possible.
Which is where you come in.
It's obvious you care about jazz. You're currently viewing a website called All About Jazz. You didn't happen here by accident, searching for nude pictures of comely actress Anne Hathaway. And you obviously care about AAJ, at least a little. Or else you'd have already surfed on to the 3.42 million other websites that do have nude pictures of comely actress Anne Hathaway.
We're not asking for much. We're not going to start charging for content, or roping off the good stuff in the Premium Member's section. All we're asking for is a little walking-around money to help us with a few projects that will make this site better, and benefit jazz in the process. We're trying to improve our data aggregation, so that the calendars will provide more information to help people find live jazz near where they are. And we've got some ideas for some neat mobile apps for iPhone and Android, 'cause all the cool kids are doing it.
So, if you could, kick a little into the kitty for the cause. And to show our thanks, besides actually doing with your money what we say we will, we'll give you a fairly entertaining short (which also happens to reiterate the salient points of this little proposal) featuring Admiral Ricci and Your Own Personal Genius as animated robots. Which will keep you amused while you sift through all the tame material from Princess Diaries to get to the really good stuff from Love and Other Drugs.
(And for the ladies, substitute Jake Gyllenhaal for Anne Hathaway. And, of course, swap Donnie Darko for Princess Diaries. Love and Other Drugs, by all accounts, can stay where it is.)